Pregnancy Blues

Thirty five weeks pregnant. No sleep. Exhaustion. Sore. Fat. Anxious. Lonely.

He works all the time, he travels all the time. I feel like a single Mom. I lay awake next to him at nights, resenting his job for not allowing us to have a normal life. This isn't how it should be. But what is a normal life?

Gone are the Brady Bunch days. Gone are the nights we go to bed together, have breakfast together, have dinner together. Gone are the weekends of family time.

We live in a world of busy, busy, busy. Work, work, work. Live to pay the bills and get out of debt.

He provides for the family.

She raises the kids and keeps the house tidy.

In the midst of what he does and what she does, somehow you make time for each other. But 5 min here and 5 min there just doesn't seem to cut it.

I want the Brady Bunch life. I want more family time. But who really gets that anymore? I'm scared. I'm terrified of bringing another of God's spirit's in to this world. This busy, crazy, scary, exciting world. This world whose view on the importance of family has greatly diminished.

With the hardships of the economy comes even more demands from Fathers. More demand of their time away from home. More demand of their sleep time and more demand of their energy.

I've got the Pregnancy Blues. I don't see an end in sight for this single mother feeling to go away. He will keep on traveling and he will keep on working and I will keep on feeling like a single mother. If the Pioneer Women did it, I suppose I can too. But for now I just want to sulk and have a pity party with Me and my enormous tummy.